The Luxury of Patience During a Remodel

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What’s your personality based on the following question: Does waiting to replace a broken faucet drive you crazy or do you pass it off as no big deal?

Before you cheer about your need for speed or start patting yourself on the back for leisurely walking to the next bathroom let’s consider a few ideas.

Patience on a little fix like a faucet is just a thought experiment on a small scale. You know you have more than one faucet in your house. Worst case scenario there is one bathroom faucet and one kitchen faucet (excluding any outside faucets). So at least there is one place to wash your hands, even if it is not the most convenient location after using the bathroom.

From a frustration standpoint it might not be so bad, or is it to you?

Similarly, patience during a remodel is quite easy in a situation where you take one bathroom out of commission but you still have another fully functional bathroom somewhere else in your house. Sure, it might not be the closest bathroom, but you still have a fully functional bathroom.

A few years ago I ripped apart my master bathroom with my own two hands…and a few tools. It was no big deal since I have two and a half bathrooms in my pad.

I had already bought a few items for the remodel like tile and the vanity sinks and faucets. My good friend had given me a beautiful mirrored soap dispenser I couldn’t wait to put on the Blue Pearl Granite slab I was planning on buying for the vanity countertop. So you might think I’d be full bore ahead on getting the entire bathroom done as fast as possible.

Except life happened and it took a year and a half. One burned (husband’s) foot and not enough done prior to a wedding where it could have had some prime time were certainly speed bumps.

This was the pencils down moment before the wedding, where the project sat like this for a couple months:

There were a couple other positive reasons increasing the amount of patience with the project.

1. I enjoyed the luxury of having more than one bathroom after my “love affair” with Home Depot bathrooms. That experience was (and still is) too recent to forget and appreciate.
2. I already beautified the other full bathroom with the exact same finishes of the soon-to-be glamorous master. So the look and feel was already something I love.
3. Having lovingly set the tile in myself, every time I used the first bathroom is another chance at admiring the work.

Despite the lack of motivation I did finish the project. The last five years of pleasure was worth every minute of the wait.

But what if you only have one of something and it goes kaput? After the initial, “OH SHIT!” and thoughts of “WHY NOW?!?”, what is your mentality?

Some finer details around a situation make a big difference in your reaction:

Planned or unplanned remodeling

There is a difference between a preplanned remodel and an “Oh $hit, there is a little leak that went undetected and now we have to fix the mold that seemingly appeared overnight/ unexpectedly forced to rip something out.” During a preplanned remodel you get to plan out leisurely beforehand and you are more likely to have a smaller downtime. In the Oh-$hit situation you are moving as fast as possible amassing the new finishes (tile, faucets, cabinetry, etc.) with a down and out room along with the downtime during the remodel.

DIY or point and pay

Is someone waiting on your decision or are you in full control because you decided to go for it on your own? Are you leaving the heavy lifting to someone else or are you learning a new skill/ honing your previous skill set? Both can be frustrating at times, but you may have more patience with yourself.

Given these parameters it is totally justifiable if you want to react differently. However, it does impact your mentality and those around you. The luxury of patience spills out into so many more positive benefits. At the same time, too much patience has some serious drawbacks.

Decision making

If you willingly decide to add in a little extra patience during a remodel you don’t end up with rush decisions. Taking your time ensures you do not have buyer’s remorse later. There is nothing worse than living with consequences–it is a constant reminder of a decision you regret.

Almost every time I put my socks away I consciously and happily walk past my walk-in shower where I painstakingly planned every last detail. If I rushed and did a sloppy job, or picked finishes that are not just right I would be reminded EVERY time I put my socks away.

Caveat: If you are working with a contractor you need to make your decisions now or push out their start time until you are done making your decisions. They have other customers and mouths to feed. Dragging out your decision and making their lives harder is unfair to them. If you have a case of indecision on a DIY project you can also shoot yourself in the foot by not starting or completing a project.

Time

Patience allows you to enjoy the remodel experience. You certainly can’t complain about the speed of a remodel when you are doing it DIY style. Now you know why it takes so long!

You should not have to complain about a contractor doing the work either. It is their job to keep a project moving as fast as possible. It is also their job to communicate the timeline, work completed at any point, unexpected hiccups (you would have encountered doing DIY anyway), etc.

Con #1: Too much time and patience can lead to long project timelines. At worst, it drags out too long and you move on to a new project, leaving the current one unfinished. If this is the case, you may have a tendency for creating a backlog of unfinished projects.

Con #2: There are times when impatience is necessary. Action is needed if a product does not arrive in a timely manner. It is also justified if a contractor does not communicate, show up, or follow the agreed upon plans without previously mentioning an agreed upon change.

Con #3: Another potential problem is project creep (with the additional problem of more expenses). There is only so much you can afford and at some point you have to stop the bleeding. If you are doing this DIY style you don’t have to compromise with yourself. If you are working with a contractor you may have to break the project into pieces. In any case, the original schedule is easily blown and extended out. Add a little patience to the mix, slide the time scheduled to the right, put the project on hold, and save up to cover the unexpected issue.

Satisfaction

Griping about how hard it is to live without a second something is no good. Let’s insert “bathroom” as that second something.

IF YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE BATHROOM PLEASE STOP WITH THE TIME CRUNCH QUESTION. A BATHROOM DOWN AND OUT IN FULLY GUTTED GLORY IS TRULY IS A LUXURY TO ENJOY.

Go walk over an extra twenty feet and use the other toilet in your house. The luxury of patience means you enjoy the stroll.

Con: If the project is extended out for dishonest reasons your impatience is justified.

Better contractor/ family/ friends experience

If you are going the point and pay route, the contractor is more willing to cater to your requests if you are relaxed in your conversations and expectations. An extra request or some compression of the schedule is much easier to grant for a chill and appreciative customer in comparison to an impatient one.

Your family and friends will notice a difference if you have a healthy dose of patience. There is no getting around the fact that remodeling is stressful–even through a small one. They will want to still be around you while you are going through the project!

Hint: if your coworkers make a mad dash into the nearest aisle before you pass them in the hall you might be in this category. You know you are doing OK if rather than avoiding you they ask to see progress pictures.

Con: if it goes so well you will want to do another project then the next section on savings gets applied to the next one. Is it really a savings then? 😉

Savings

Savings goes hand and hand with decision making and time. When you are not rushing there are no overnight delivery charges, last minute work order changes, or extra people needed to shorten the timeline–all of which cost more. Proper planning keeps spending to a minimum. Now you can buy coffee and donuts for yourself and your contractor! You can also use that savings to upgrade a fixture or some other aspect of the project.

Defining your relationship with patience

So now how did you answer the question in the beginning?

Only you can determine your mindset and what it is that you are willing to deal with in a happy manner. As I wrote about my own experience without a toilet for months, it ended up being a pretty funny situation where I can’t help but appreciate Home Depot bathrooms.

As you can see there are pitfalls and bonuses to both sides of patience if you are extreme either direction. However, erring on the side of patience makes the remodel experience easier on you and those around you.

Hopefully, we can all meet somewhere in the middle.