Paint a Room? I Would Rather Replace a Toilet

**Our honesty policy: This post may contain affiliate links and I may be compensated if you make a purchase at no extra cost to you. Some are, some aren't--I do some comparison shopping. The important thing is you will know exactly what we are talking about. Drop a note/comment if you have any questions on the products as these are materials and tools we use on our own projects.

If you have been reading this blog during the past few months you may have had the following questions briefly cross your mind:

Doesn’t the name of this blog use the word “paint”? Why are there no “paint” related blog posts?

I actually don’t like painting.*

Painting is boring. I am an artist. In my book a canvas of any type is a place for many colors. In the least, it should consist of gradients of a single color (charcoal is my favorite medium). Meanwhile, a wall is a single color, bold striped pattern, or some slightly more interesting pattern.

I have included a couple of pictures of my charcoal drawings for comparison to a random, but very much representative wall of my house in its current state below:

Of all house related tasks, painting, while immediately rewarding, is a monotonous task you can master relatively quickly with knowledge and patience. Other projects involve math, continuous problem solving and different physical activities. The only thing paint has in common with these other tasks is attention to detail.

In general, the vast majority of our homes consist of a whole lot of walls with a single color. To clarify, each room can be a different color, but there is a single color on each wall (this blanket statement captures accent walls too). If done right, this color is painted anywhere from two to six times (I’m including layers of primer in this estimate**), attaining the solid color perfectly matching the color sample dried on the paint can, along with straight lines along the edges.

However, a paint job done poorly is not boring, but ugly.

No one likes to look at overlapping lines when you can clearly see where the paint roller went over the wall twice. Lines in the corners should be straight not wavy. Little bleed marks coming from paint seeping under painter’s tape are a daily annoyance you don’t realize bother you until they are gone. Although, small bleed marks are better than no tape at all for those who color outside the lines (see fancy illustration below). The worst finished paint flaws are the drips that remind you of a horror movie. It’s even worse when you are laying in bed staring at it on the ceiling!

Guess what I’m no longer hosting an audience with in my throne room? A bad paint job is a good motivator to repaint even if you don’t like to paint.

When I bought my second house it was a poster child of all of these paint problems. However, it also took “how not to paint a room” to the next level: too many competing colors and ideas. On top of this, so many of the walls were unfinished…

The copper and red paint does not quite meet at the corner. Nor any of the cabinets either. The lap lines highlight the copper back splash paint. WTF is going on in the background?!?

I’m sure the people who lovingly painted these walls would think my choices are boring. I totally agree. My husband and I repainted every single inch of wall–and even worse– the vaulted ceilings, too!*** I still put some very taste specific finishes in the bathrooms and the master closet. However, I also know in order to appeal to the vast majority of home buyers and sell this house for top dollar I would have to have a different paint scheme than the one I inherited. Since I want to enjoy my work for as long as possible and on my own schedule, I would rather put in the effort now so I have less to do before I leave. On top of that, I had a heck of a lot less stuff to move around nine years ago than I do now.

Painting is simply a means to an end.****

I CAN paint a room like a pro, but that does not mean I LIKE doing it. I appreciate the final result, but it is my least favorite task out of all house projects. The list it is up against is pretty long. It includes:

• The water main breaking leaving no water for a number of days just a week before giving birth to my daughter (at least it was not the week after!).
• The leaking roof I inherited and the repairs I completed during its replacement.
• And that followed by an unexpected downpour one night during said replacement (exposed roof decking)– It destroyed all the drywall I had just installed, taped, floated and painted myself and caused additional damages (had to repair inside TWICE, plus my garage).
• I would, in fact, rather replace a toilet in all its disgusting glory.

Yes, painting is that low on my list.

*Admittedly, the one time I was semi-excited about painting occurred when we primed all the walls. I would wake up, call my husband (then boyfriend) and exclaim, “Guess what day it is!?!?” He hesitantly and begrudgingly replied, “Painting day” after hearing my painting day faux happy song and dance. Weekend after weekend of painting made his enthusiasm (or lack thereof) go right down the drain. So, I had to keep amping up my “GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS?!?” question and answer. Even after we were on the color phase and I was soooo over it. You gotta finish what you start, right? 😀 Thanks, for humoring me, Babe!

**Six is extreme, but sometimes four layers of primer are ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY to fully bury a certain kind of paint scheme.  OH YES, A MUCH ANTICIPATED POST! Starting to build the suspense…

***The closets were not painted in this original effort.  However, the downpour mentioned above infiltrated the closets in three bedrooms, requiring drywall repair. I am extremely grateful it did not get in any of the bathrooms with the previously complete tile work. But, c’mon, I had to paint the closets too?!? As for the master closet, I will still place the blame on a particularly glamorous lady who inspired me to paint it. However, I fully own doing it and enjoy the end result every day.  😉

****Technically the vast majority of DIY house renovations and smaller projects fall under this statement. But since I’m ranting on this post, I’m drawing the line based on enjoying tasks.  I could have lived in my house without new baseboard, showers, or extravagant stacked stone on the exterior. But, as you may have guessed, I enjoy doing these tasks for entertainment and personal growth.