A Mustachian Wedding: Trading Manual Labor for Vows

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All the guys out there are thinking the same thought, “Oh no! She just turned into a girl and now this blog is going to start talking about flowers, ribbons and glitter. I’m out!” I commend you for even clicking on this article knowing that’s what you might find.*

Stick with me and I won’t let you down.

Girlishness aside, paying for a venue, marriage prep classes, food and other larger expenses related to your average $29,858 American wedding (as of when we got married in 2014) was a sticker shock. There is no way we were going to spend over half of the median American household income, $53,657, on a single day.

Memorable, glamorous, fun, and surrounded by friends and family?

YES!

Going into debt or extending our engagement so we could save up ahead of time?

NO!

We wanted to go the more traditional route with all of our family celebrating with us. At the same time, my husband and I are both Mustachian (for those of you not familiar with this term let me introduce you to Mr Money Mustache). This combination of desires and tendencies, on top of my husband madly trying to pay off his credit cards and student loans had us thinking outside the box.

Our answer: manual labor.

At the time All Saints Catholic Church in downtown Tempe was in the middle of rebuilding the main chapel along with a reception hall. We gambled on the reception hall being operational in time for our wedding. If all went according to their build schedule we would only be the second reception in the new hall…on the second weekend it was open. If you have had any brush with construction you know this is dicey…

Of other significant note, there is also a historic old church on site. The sanctuary was no longer used for services due to deteriorating conditions with all funds going to the new construction, but the basement was still being used for offices.

We brought a proposal to the church. We would secure materials and paint all the exterior doors on the old church, as well as the western facing windows, in exchange for the cost of marriage prep classes and the reception hall after the wedding.

Upon agreeing to the deal, they asked us to start in the middle of September. If you check the average temperature for Tempe, AZ in the middle of September you’ll find the heat of the day is 99–juuuuust a shade under three digits. With a western facing wall, the sun radiated heat well into the evening.

If you read the directions on the Behr paint can, the manufacturer stipulates paint should only be applied between the temperatures of 35 and 90. We were golden on the lower temp! Not so much on the upper end of the scale.

Despite the temperature problem, this ended up working out for us (although it was still hot as hell when we started in the afternoon). Painting is not just grabbing a paintbrush and going to town. There were days and days of prep work. With full time jobs the days of prep work were spread across a good portion of the month–weeks of prepping.

First, we stripped off as much of the old paint as we could.

Next, we used a TSP solution so the primer would adhere properly, and taped off all surrounding surfaces. We also patched larger gaps with spray foam and recaulked around all the doors and windows. All of the baked single pane windows needed some amount of reglazing.

As much as I hate painting, working on our church as a couple was a really fun, unique experience not available every day.

It’s 10:50 pm on a Monday night painting the front entryway of the church on the top of a rickety scaffold on the top landing of a set of stairs. Do you know where your daughter is?

Skillet*** bounced off the newly created echo chamber in the courtyard between the old church and the new chapel well past midnight on work nights.

We had a date night with Subway sandwiches on the top of my Frankenstein eight foot scaffold at the top of the stairs of the main entrance to the church.

A romantic place for a picnic!

It also gave us a break off our feet.

Bartering is still possible despite the fact we often just point and pay for almost everything today.

It just so happens my husband and I offset the cost of the wedding, venue and classes by painting the outside of the old church. It didn’t have to be painting. It could have been any kind of necessary project:

• Lawn maintenance/ gardening
• Clerical work
• Any other skilled labor you have such as setting up a network/ security system, lawyer services, electrical, plumbing, tiling, etc.

Maybe your church does not have any maintenance projects or other opportunities in mind, but what about an off-site venue for the reception?

It is also possible to work on driving down the cost on materials as well. For instance, we could talk to manufacturers for donations or price break because the church is a charitable organization. We were able to work with Behr, who graciously donated their top-of-the-line Marquee paint for the doors and windows, which is still holding up well.

Thinking outside the box is key. A Mustachian wedding can be glamorous, ritzy and traditional**. When trading manual labor for vows you are flexing your Mustachian muscles. In fact, it is even more of a Mustachian wedding when you have a hand in the look of your venue.

It’s not every day you get to pose in front of your work in your wedding gown or tux.

Happy fifth anniversary, Babe.

*Creating my own centerpieces, boutonnieres, and bouquets (with the help of the ladies pictured and a couple moms) was another one of the best parts of the event. As a lady of course I love all the glamorous wedding decorations and flowers! But as an artist and engineer I want to do a lot of the work myself. How often do you get to play with hundreds of roses, calla lilies and orchids?!?! For me, once. Unless, miraculously, someone loved my decorations so much they put me in charge of this part of their wedding. Any takers?

I am actually serious. I would loooooove to do it again. Except it would be the only thing I am doing which means I am not pulled in 100 different directions.

**We also never would have made it to the finish line without every last family member and friend helping us get there. From my parents who arrived the week before to get finish off drywall repairs to the rehearsal dinner venue (my house) among many other projects, to friends getting off the airplane and ironing table clothes, single-handedly cooking the rehearsal dinner, performing a rear end axle replacement on an S-10 to pull the cargo trailer to the venue, assisting other people cross country to attend, friends who were the musicians, and everything in between. With the monumental effort it took of so many people it is easy to see why weddings cost so much. You all know who you are–THANK YOU!

***Another fun fact. Skillet performed in Phoenix the same day we were married. We sent them an invitation to the wedding. They didn’t show, but they sent a postcard.